We all make mistakes that are regrettable, but when you’re a kid, the results can be even more devastating, especially when you see that the mistake you made has cost you the trust of your parents. Sometimes a kid has no idea how much his parents do trust him, and how important that is to him, until he’s lost it.
Most parents start out putting full trust in their child, but little things like lying, telling half-truths, and breaking household rules can change a parent’s heart. Not that the parent will stop loving the child, instead, the parent becomes more aware of the child’s negative tendencies and scrutinizes him, his actions, and his words, more so than before.
If a mistake of yours has left your parents less than trusting of you, don’t expect them to suddenly start trusting you again as soon as you say you’re sorry. Saying I’m sorry is a good place to start, but not if you don’t mean it. Parents have a knack for telling if their kid is being sincere. And, saying I’m sorry means you never want to hurt someone by doing that again. If your parents have heard you say I’m sorry, then seen you turn around and do the same thing again, they already know you’re not sorry, but just trying to get out of trouble.
If you truly are sorry for what you did, I’m sorry really isn’t enough. Tell your parents why you’re sorry and why you don’t think you’ll do it again. Explain to them how you were feeling when you did whatever it was. As sincere as you may be, this still will not make them instantly trust you again.
To gain back your parents full and complete trust, now that you’ve broken it, will take time. In addition, you’ll have to prove to your parents that you deserve their trust again. The way to prove this is to be truthful with them, no matter what. After losing their trust in you, and depending upon what it was that you did to cause their distrust, parents might decide it’s in your best interest for them to search your room on occasion, follow you or check up on you, and even forbid you to leave the house.
Go along with them, no matter how tough it is. This is what they need to do before they can feel comfortable about trusting you again. If you were caught smoking, quit. They’ll eventually find out that you’re still doing it and distrust you even more. If you were caught lying, be completely truthful with them, no matter what. If you were caught sneaking out of the house, refrain from doing it again. Eventually, your parents will see that you’ve learned your lesson and will slowly begin to trust you again.
It doesn’t hurt to volunteer to do extra things around the house, plan little surprises for them, like a good report card, or to be kinder to your siblings. All of these things go along with trusting you again, since they will see that you’ve changed in more ways than one, and that you care enough about how they feel to put out a little extra effort to please them.
Of course, it won’t do any good to try and manipulate them by being a nice kid, for now, cleaning up around the house and playing games with little sis, if you’re planning on earning their trust back long enough to break it again. Your actions have hurt your parents and your sincerity and honesty will be the only way you can win them back.Of course